“You know this is painful spot, yes?”
“Yeah man, all good” I reply, full of false bravado and anticipation.
The understated industrial style studio is clean. My artist has just finished preparing the bench and the smell of antiseptic is still strong in the air. An arrangement of indoor plants and succulents sits on the…
I was trying to explain to him why the only phrase I knew in French besides, “Oui, oui,” was “Will you please take off your shirt for me darling?”
He seemed perplexed.
“There was this song that was huge in Australia in 2009 called ‘Parlez-Vous Français’ by this local band, Art Vs. Science. That phrase…
“Let’s just get super fucked up, hey?”
It’s a plan. We drink rum, vodka, gin and Bintang longnecks skulled outside a bar, and multiple free shots of arak given out like candy to babies. We have long-winded conversations that go nowhere, get drenched in the rain and boogie to The Strokes at 2am.
If my…
It was any other Saturday night. I was at a gay bar, drinking too many vodka redbulls and losing my mind over Britney song after GaGa song, having a good time with my friends. I was wearing new clothes and I felt like I looked good, a confidence that helps in environments like gay bars.…
The Italian Restaurant / July 10 – July 11
When a restaurant has a banner across their storefront that reads “Best thin crust pizza in South Yarra” – Dave, you bloody well know it must be good. Unfortunately, when the chef demanded I tell the woman who received raw chicken in her meal he would not…
Our roommate, J, told me this was the coldest winter Tokyo had experienced in 48 years. He told this to Gemma, too. Information from Jonny is taken with a grain of rice, but there’s no denying that it has been exceptionally cold. Almost-50-year-storm cold? How would I know? J had the propensity of cornering us…
I am sobbing as surreptitiously as I can in a scungy Indonesian bathroom, clutching two strawberry daiquiris bigger than my head. My cleavage is blistering beneath someone else’s Bintang and outside, Rihanna is shrieking at some fleshy Western youths to “WOOOOORK!” as they jump frantically under orange strobes.
I want to stab myself in the…
The night air was thick and warm as the streets of Vietnam’s Ho Chi Minh City pulsated with energy. I slipped into a local supermarket to grab some last-minute snacks, something that had become a ritual when prepping for an overnight bus ride. The supermarket aisles were just as relentless as the motorbike filled streets.…
I squeeze my dad's hand in excitement.
"Look!" I exclaim.
There’s a splash in the water where the ocean meets the sand. A crab scurries along.
There are little crab holes all along this Fijian beach, where crustaceans hide from the eager three-year-olds trying to imprison them. With pail and spade in hand, we bundle…
The lights have just come up and I’m high as a kite. The last DJ is putting records into boxes and the crowd is dispersing. I look at my friends around me. Their eyes are dinner plates.
“Woah…” Mag says, who has spent the last hour convinced he is a pirate in a medieval era…
“Could you excuse me just a second,” I say calmly. But I think the look on my face has given something away.
“Everything okay?” he replies.
“Yeah, I think I just have to go do a sneaky vom.”
It’s so not a vom.
“Oh shit, really? You all right?”
Fuck no.
“Yeah, all g. Just…
A sea of flaccid penises seemed to stare at me as I undressed before the parade of predominantly middle-aged men. It’s not often someone gains my admiration while emerging naked in a locker room, but there I was, commending their courage to let it all hang and not give a shit. Perhaps it’s a little…